Monday, January 26, 2015
Why You Shouldn't Have Children
"...It can't be about who we might make, and what they might do, anymore. It has to be about who we are, and what we're going to do." Caitlin Moran ends her argument with this phrase and it really captures how a lot of women feel. She was the successful woman with lots of ambitions, independence, strength, and focus. She built her reputation and was proud of who she had become, but with that achievement she never stopped to really think about settling down. Of course whenever women are asked about men in their lives, or thoughts of children they say they're fine because that's all they know. It is not bad being single, or with someone with no pressure to get married/move forward. Society has put this pressure on women to have children before 35. This number is huge because after this number, women approach 40, and having children close to or around 40 is considered a huge "no-no". So now that women are trapped with these child baring years it leaves everyone asking questions about when women will have children. Because there are deadlines and rules it's a pressing matter for everyone to know. "Do you want to have kids?" most people respond "yes". "When do you want to have kids?" this question throws everyone off because there isn't a right answer. It's a trick question and I think Caitlin Moran is completely right when she says it's code for "When are you going to blow a four-year chunk, minimum, out of your career-at an age where most people's attractiveness, creativity, and ambition is peaking-by having a baby?" It's on everyone's mind when women are in that age gap. Caitlin Moran makes an excellent point later in the text about how women should be judged on who they are and not how soon they will reproduce. She thought out her point of view very thoughtfully and I agree with every aspect of it. Her journey and interviews she went through before having children were very honest and it's the truth. She used her own experiences as evidence and some other people as references to enforce her point. It's well written and I couldn't have said it better myself.
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After reading Why You Shouldn’t Have Children by Caitlin Moran, it shows that we women are changing the traditional motherly roles into roles of successful leadership and business women. Generation after generation societal norms are changing, and that’s okay. Women are putting their own future first and then come around to the idea of children becoming a part of their ever-changing future. What most women are now thinking is that an ideal life would consist of bettering ourselves and create a stable lifestyle, and then begin to start thinking about the whole child aspect of life. However, the stigma of having children after 40 being a “no-no” is such a common thing to know. Even being only 18 and 19 years old, we understand that women have biological clocks where we “have” to have children by a certain age. I guess, however, these ideals never thought of that fact that there are now so many fertility processes that can prolong the wait to have children. One thing in Moran’s chapter is when she talks about how after becoming a mother it affects the entirety of life, which is somewhat true, but could also be seen as offensive. Just because children come into the picture, doesn’t mean that life comes to a complete stop. Even though you may be mother you can still accomplish your dreams, it now just has a little bit of a challenge added. In accordance to your points, I also believed that her ending argument was very strong and was very empowering to all women in today’s society. Mothers or not, you will always learn a little something from life.
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